RIP baby Gecko.

Yes, you heard right.  I murdered a baby Gecko today. I took up the honor of sweeping my neighbors house and I accidentally stepped on the tiny creature. He looked at me and opened his mouth wide. We had a funeral service for him. Given, it was mostly for the 6 year old who witnessed this horrendous act, but all in all...RIP poor baby Gecko.

TTFN <3

Ugh. Its that kind of day.

UGH. Yes, thats all I got. Its been a little over a month since Hubby left.  Some days suck but for the most part its better then I thought. I decided to stay here in TX instead of going back home. Not very many people were happy about it. But why would I quit my job and start over more than I have to?

Its days like this where I want to be home. It just sucks sometimes. I look at the friends I have made here and they're all leaving when hubby gets back, moving away like military families do. Then I'm missing out on my family and friends lives as well back home. It gets deppressing when I sit and think about it.  I go to sleep alone, I come home to be alone, I dont cook anymore because I'm alone. Depressing huh?  Its okay, its just one of those days. Usually I'm happy and just going on 'till the hubby comes home again. Getting things done and holding my head up. But today....today isn't good. I miss being home. My best friend of 10 years mom passed away today and I cant be there to hold her hand through it. Its bad enough I miss out on all the little ones lives and more. But really?  Will I even be able to make it to the memorial?
"It must be hard being away from close friends like that" Guess what? Everything is hard. Maybe its the first timers struggle but being away from EVERYBODY uncluding the reason you're here while hes fighting or reestablishing for this country we call the land of the free, just..sucks. Haha, but you know? I wouldn't have it any other way. I'm a very thankful human being and I'm not lounging around depressed. If it wasnt for friends or having a job I would not be in this state. Honestly. I love my friends here. They keep me strong because they know what its like. I think I'm adjusting pretty well. I get to talk to hubby more than I thought i was and that makes everything better.

Okay, enough of the sad pity me rambling.  I am gonna blog a lot more and take lots of pictures more often. I'm excited to start college and more. I'm excited to set up my home to make it a HOME. Right now it looks like a bachelors pad haha. By the end of the day, I'm happy I stayed here. Despite the bugs :P

Let the true journey begin....

Here I am thinking that I had at least a week left with my husband when I come to find out just yesterday that I have less than that.  *sigh* Welp.  What can you do?   I decided that I'd stay in Texas, in our lil home till he comes home.  Things might change but for now this is what I want to do lol.  I might be a lil crazy.  But it makes sense. We shall see!!  I mean, I rather keep my job and focus on furnishing  and decorating our home.  I've only been waiting to do this for almost a year!  Then college of course and staying in the loop of things here on base and sooo much more.  I beleive in my strength.  First deployment or not.

But on another note, we went to Oregon to visit family and friends for about 10 days. That was nice and relaxing. My anixety only acted up on the plane ride and the first 3 days in Oregon. Haha did I ever mention that I officially HATE plane rides?  Yea, I'm gonna avoid them as much as possible. If thats even possible in this life LOL.  Let me show you how green Oregon truly is:
                               

Gorgous right?  I literally forgot the visual image of my words when I told everybody just how green that state is.  We flew in and it was surreal.  The air was amazingly fresh.  God, how I missed that. But I know that I would come to hate that state as soon as winter hit. Lol rain rain go away!!

Then came the visiting of friends and family. May I mention something a little immature: Although we all have our own lifes and values; for a day it'd be nice for people to just SHUT UP and let loose. Stop over thinking and for the life of me...please just stop thinking about themselves for a day?  Okay, now that is said. the visiting was GREAT. I was so happy to see my family and hubby's. Meeting the new babies that we missed out on.  More pics please!!!

Me and my best friends daughter aka my beautiful niece!! She is now 7 months old. 

Hubby and his baby cousin who he just met and is now a year old and the cutest thing EVER!!

Then there was my baby brother whom I havent seen since he was about 2 months old and is now a year old. You miss so much with family when you move. Wish I would've taken a ton more pictures but silly me forgot our camera. Lol Although I dont want to miss anymore growth of people and their children..thier lifes. I gotta grow mine as well. It was really nice seeing family and friends. Although NOTHING has really changed. Not even a little bit besides the kiddos growing up.  I did. It was weird being home again. Things were the exact same but it didn't feel the same. I couldn't see myself living in my hometown. Or my hubby's hometown. Ever. But with that being said i did miss everyone and it was a great visit. 

I dont know to much about the working of things right now. I just want to finish up my goals and pray for my hubby's safe return and my sanity. lol. my emotions are taking a toll on me already and he isn't even gone yet. So I better get off this computer and love on him. 

TTFN<3 

                                                                                                                             

Catch up.

So life has been busy like no other.  I quit my YMCA job to work as a nanny. Considering Hubby is leaving next month. The army changed the date. So instead of september he's leaving in August.  All in all, the nanny job is more personal, less stressful, and is helping a lot with finances and such.  We'll be going home to Oregon at the end of this month...yaaaaay! Haha.  Then I will be moving back home at least a month or so after he deploys.  That little fact is making my stomach turn.  Why must he go?  His orders read "should not exceed 455 days" so possibly 15 months??  This deployment is ALREADY an inconvience.  I would love to keep my husband if you dont mind.  But ey,  the contract and the chioce is on him/us so who can complain?  Being without him and moving back home right when I get comfy here is starting up my anxiety. Why do I feel this way? Its home after all. Where I lived for 18 years of my life. Where my friends and family are. Where my roots will always be. So why the fear of adjustment?....ahhh thats what it is after all. Fear of re adjusting right after I just got adjusted here then having to move back when he gets back. More moving and readjusting. Ugh I hope I can handle it mentally. Ha.

I'm gonna miss my husband. A lot. Like I'm gonna be aching when he leaves for days.  *sigh*  not looking forward to the emotional stress of it all. Not to mention all the things we STILL have to do here before he leaves. MAKE THE TIME STOP!!!!!!!

Well heres some pictures anyways.  I'll write more, I promise. Hehe

Being dorks. As always <3

And heres My Busterrr

Well, TTFN =P

Pause!!

I wish time would just stop.  Just for a tiny bit.  Let my husband come home, then stop the clock. Ha.

But we all know that is wishful thinking on my part. But he is coming home in a little over a week! I'm excited.  A little disapointed that i wasn't able to get our finances situated and now I gotta stress over trying to come home for his leave time. But hey..."everything will be okay in the end, if its not okay, its not the end."

I try to live by that as much as possible. My job is going pretty good. It adds a little more stress, but whatever.  I enjoy it. I work with kiddos.  Which is always interesting! Lol I've been working there for a little over a month now so I got the hang of things.

Annnnd I died my hair.  Haha, I was so sick of my roots. Gross. Lol so I touched them up and I'm very pleased.

So there it is!!

Welp, I gotta go back to counting down the days that the hubby comes home and not stress. TTFN=)

Oh boy....

He's been gone for almost a month.  I've been trying to keep myself busy and my stress level down.  Not as easy as it looks folks! Who would've guessed that being an adult, married and throwing in the military makes your head spin.  Boy oh boy...

I'm excited for him to come home.  Really, I miss my partner. I cant whine and brainstorm without him! Lol.
Everything has me stressed out lately.  Everything. And its even getting him stressed.  Which I cant have.
I have tons of pictures from April to now.  But I got so much on my mind and so much to do around the house that its not even funny.

TTFN =)

Life marches on!

Its been a while! I started blogging once every night or so and now its maybe once a month!
Well, not a whole lot has been missed.  My birthday was the first saturday of this month and I got a part time job!  Our finances have really been kicking our butts.  So me landing a job happened just in time :)
Hubby turns 20 on Monday and unfortunatly I cant cook that big 'ol dinner. But i WILL be baking an awesome cake. Then he wants to go to see Iron man on Friday. I'm exicted. A night out with my babe<3

He is going on his one month training in California in about 2 weeks. Tell me time doesn't fly!!

Anyway, I will be blogging more tomorrow and some pics to post :)

TTFN!!